The struggle is real.
I would love to say I am a consistently productive person, but in good conscious, I can not. I am a natural procrastinator and professional time waster. It’s especially fun with the girls, or with arts and crafts! Amer is the opposite; very task focused and he has a set amount of things to do each day for GVT. Sometimes it’s hard to understand each other, because we exist in different productivity realities, but we are learning to value the other’s perspective.
Most of us have been at home more often these last few months: staring our partners and our own routines (or lack there of) in the face. To stay happy and healthy, we’ve had to reevaluate our relationship with time. We now have to change how we conceptualize productivity- especially in changing or difficult times. You want to stay sane, I want to stay sane, and we all deserve to be happy.
Quality > Quantity
So we’re all at home, obviously spending a lot of time together- but are we filling that time efficiently, and valuing the important things? Chores vs playtime is a constant back and forth at our house. We might be on a walk outside, or drawing chalk pictures on the back porch, or dancing/wrestling/playing tag. When Lela naps, sometimes Zara and I just hangout and watch a movie. I am most happy when we are all together, creating bonds and memories, playing and laughing. Meanwhile; the dishes pile up, messes get made (little kids are wild, it gets crazy fast) and all the sudden they’re asleep- the house looks like a circus, and I think, “I’ve gotten nothing done today.”
But, then I remind myself that I did. I taught Zara the difference between turtle and tortoise, I drew at least 10 ghosts- each with a different emotion, and I showed Lela how to climb up a hillside. Sometimes there are more important things than that mental checklist- The key is slowing down to pay attention- so you don’t miss them. Instead of tallying our quantitative progress on daily chores and checklists, we can focus on making a meaningful and positive impact.
Long term > Short term
We all value efficiency, but in moments of uncertainty, it’s normal for our focus to fall apart. We have to step back and take in the larger scope of our situation. We can acknowledge certain tasks may go on hold, while we focus on getting through this upheaval. We can start thinking in long terms like “how will these decisions affect me in 6 months, 6 years?” “What should I keep doing, what should I start changing?”
This is a great opportunity to build and maintain new boundaries in our lives. We are comfortable in our own space, we have faced difficult times, and become acquainted with what is “worth it” and what isn’t. We’ve decided we want to do more of what matters in life, and less of the rest. We can ask ourselves, “What do I value, what do I want to preserve?” And conversely, “what would I like less of in my life, what can I let go of?”
We can start with letting go of other people’s definitions of A N Y T H I N G, and we can learn when to say no. It’s a journey that’s unique to each person, family, or work dynamic. Think about whatever makes the most sense for you, and what you choose to value in what way. Draw the lines for whatever picture you’d like your life to be.
Bottom line: Prioritize what’s important to you and your own personal happiness. Because really, that’s all that matters. I support you! And I love you 💕